Public Bathroom Etiquette

I will start by saying, I hate public bathrooms. The hate is mitigated a bit if they are clean, but really, ewww. Also, the hate is reflected upon several times a day during the week, because I work in a government building. Rather than 'getting over it', it may be a bit worse because of the aforementioned regular exposure. Damn.

So, wishing I could post this on the mirror/door/walls of said public bathrooms (maybe ALL public bathrooms), I will instead post here, so my three readers can ponder and agree with my diatribe. Insert whine here...

Here's some important bathroom etiquette that apparently is not widely known:

1) Wow, didn't you get taught to flush? You need to make sure your toilet flushes the poisons that your body eliminates, be they pee or poop. Key word here - poisons. That means that not only does your body not want them, but no one elses body does, either. And not only doesn't anyone else want them, but they are POISON; i.e., toxic, deadly, harmful...etc. So at a minimum, make sure your shit is gone from the bowl before you leave the stall. If your toilet doesn't seem to be able to flush, TELL SOMEONE. Just someone. Hey, public, we have Facilities Management, so whoever you tell will let the right people know. I'm not saying you have to hang around and meet everyone to get your 'problem' fixed, just tell someone and leave. And don't come back.

2) If somehow you sprinkle on the seat, WIPE IT UP. Then learn how to sit and pee and wipe without sprinkiling like a guy.

3) If you have to poop, and it's a long-term project, how about a 'courtesy flush' once or twice to keep the odor to a minimum? I realize this requires thinking ahead and/or thinking of someone other than yourself, but hey, you are in public which connotes other people are with you.

4) Regarding #3, please, please don't leave skid marks in or on the bowl. That means checking your 'work' and waiting until the flush is complete to determine if another flush is needed.

5) For the anal-retentive among my fellow workers, stop making nasty comments about people going to take a s**t. I mean, what are they supposed to do, do it on their desks, or the floor, or - ? Get over it, unless they are violators of the first 4 comments.

S**t happens. Make it easier for other people to deal with.